The Self-Control Christian Man

Author: Andre Dillard
There was a time in Wendy's  where there was a child having a tantrum, so as the people was watching the child being a nuisance to the quality of sound.  The father was cool and in control, and said, “Derek Anthony Bell try to control yourself”. They’re an elderly lady that was in the line across from him looked with awe.  As she was walking passed after she had gotten her food, as she was walking  towards the young man and said to him, “Wow!’ may I complement you on how to handle your son”. The young man turned around with a peculiar look, and  said to the lady, “Son nothing, I was talking about me”!

Now as Men especially Christian men not only are we looked at every day, but also we are targets of anything negative; furthermore, we must learn to have to self-control. Now that’s hard to do. There are many things to make you lose control especially in times like these. It could be the rising cost of gas, and food prices,  or perhaps you’re on a diet and can’t eat the foods you like, with the stress of work, and wife or girlfriend, or even ‘baby momma drama’. It could be drugs, or drinking, maybe even sexual temptation. I’m here to tell you can do it! With God’s help you can do it.  Some people might say self-control is for the weak. You know the type “I’m a man, and self-control is for wimps”! Well Jesus had self-control. Is he a wimp?  The story of Jesus in the Temple is a perfect story {John 2:13-16}. Was Jesus upset? Yes he was? There is a difference between uncontrollable rage and righteous indignation-yet they are both called anger. We must be very careful how we use the emotion of anger. It is alright to be angry about injustice and sin; it is wrong to be angry over trivial personal offenses. Keep in mind when was upset He saw the doves he was at peace.

            Self-control is a very important part of spiritual maturity.  Merriam-Webster Dictionary defines self-control as ‘restraint exercises over one’s emotions, or desires’;(italics added).  As Christians restraint is hard to do let’s take Job for another example. Job lost everything house, cattle and children.  The flesh fell from his bones, boils and scabs all over his body and private parts. Even when his friends sat with him for seven days and each of them had their own reason. Eliphaz the Termanite reason’s was Job was suffering because he had sinned. Go to God and confess your sins to him {Job 5:8} Job had restraint didn’t curse or swear at the he just simple replied “Stop assuming my guilt” {Job 6:29}.  Job other friend Bildad reason was that he was stubborn he won’t admit that he sinned. He said to Job, “how long you’re going to be like this”? {Job 8:2}. Again he had self-discipline and said, I will say to God…tell me why are you doing it”? {Job 10:2}. That wasn’t anger that was a question on what did I do?  Job still displayed self-control. His other comrade Zophar the Naamathite reason was that he deserves even more suffering than he’s experiencing (Wow, what a pal!).  He said, “Get rid of your sins” {Job 11:13, 14}.  Not on time did Job lose it. All he said was “I‘ll know I’ll be justified” {Job 13:18}. Is that faith in God or what? Job was struggling spiritually, emotionally, and physically. Even when God was silent and when he is silent in your lives, just hold on to your faith. I can say it better this way, “This is only a test”!
  1. Possibly we can alienate are selves from the drama. Try to stay in our own “little world”.  That’s not going to happen in this life or any other life. The devil is out there waiting and watching you, accusing you, tempting you. We are trying to be Christ like, and that is the way we’re supposed to be or trying to be.  Christians get that confused with being like Christ. You may ask “what does that has to do with self-control”?  Jesus was tempted in the wilderness, and that showed His self-control.  Even after forty days without eating, or drinking.   Jesus had self-control even when the devil tempted him. Now in reality we can’t go forty minutes without eating, but I here to tell you yes you can! The same power that Jesus has you has, the Holy Spirit.  In John 14:26, it reads, “But the Comforter, which is the Holy Ghost, whom The Father will send in my name, he shall teach you all things, and bring things to your remembrance” (Italics added). That was makes us Christ like. Look, you don’t have to understand Apologetics, or have a doctorate in Theology to have self-control. You can read the self-control chapter Ephesians 4; however, look at Galatians 2:20 it reads, “I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I live now I live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me.” (Italics added). Just a Christ suffered, bleed, and  died for us that again was another part of self-control as He hung on the Cross at Calvary His own words was “Father, forgive them; for they know not what they do” {Luke 22:34}. Image the pain and suffering My Lord must have been feeling, also try to understand the patients of Christ being accused, beating on, whipped, and still show compassion, and think of the things he did, Not only showing self-control , but love also.  Again self-control, so you’re saying ‘what’s the big deal ’?  I can’t do that! YES YOU CAN!  I live by this, “You can do all things through Christ that strengthens you” {Phil; 4:13}.    
  2. Anger is a great offense because it violates God’s command to love. The Bible says, “Thou shalt not kill” {Exodus 20:13}, so as a Christian male this is when you call on God for forgiveness. Even if you have the thought of murder in your heart you have committed murder in your heart. Anger is a dangerous emotion that threatens to leap out of control, leading to violence, emotional hurt, increased mental and physical stress, and spiritual damage. Anger keeps us from developing a sprit pleasing to God. There are some days that you can take pride that you didn’t strike out against, or say what is really on your mind? Bear in mind self-control is good, but Jesus wants us to practice thought-control as well. Jesus said we will be held accountable for our attitudes.
There are some people in the Bible who could have used thought-control; therefore let’s look at Samson story for a minute. Here’s a man raised up by the Lord from his parents was to be a deliver and judge over a disobedient Israel. Samson who had great potential wasted it on jokes, and getting out of fights. He could have strengthened his nation, and get them back to worshipping God, but lost focus. He could squeeze the life out of a lion, yet he could not strangle his own love. He could break open the restraints of his foes; but not the cords of his own desire. He burned the crops of others, and lost the fruit of his own asset when burning with the flame of a single woman. “For what shall it profit a man, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul” {Mark 8:36}. This is a perfect example of thought-control.

Since the deficiency of self-control has devastating results, it is needed in all areas of life not only male, female also. We live in a world where there is so much emphasis is place on our physical appearance, many exercise extreme self-control to maintain a beautiful appearance, but exercise little self-control when it comes to moral issues  such as sexual fidelity or honesty in business. Here’s another example the story of Joseph. This is an amazing story of self-control and faith. The story is remarkable divided between his disgrace and his adulation where is the same as Christ who was also humiliated and exalted.  It also shows that Christians are going to go thru many tribulations to come into the kingdom. As an adolescent Joseph was over confident, but being Jacob’s favorite son and by knowing Gods’ plan on his life.  That’s not cocky that’s an assurance. Knowing what God can do for you when you give a total sacrifice. You may be asking what does self-control has to do with this?  Let’s start here, being betrayed by family, exposed to sexual temptation, and being punished for doing the right thing; furthermore, he endured a long imprisonment, and forgotten by those who he helped. His response should have been, “why me Lord, why me”! Instead of that he had not only faith but endurance. The Joseph knew whatever he did or was at God was with him. Joseph shows in life no matter the circumstances or situations that comes to you, but how you response to them is the main goal.  In the story of Joseph with the help of God a bad situation can be made good {Genesis 37 thru 50}.

So there you have it. Take it from me; I had a bunch of people laugh at me when I told them I was doing this. Because I have a temper, a big temper, they used to call me the Tasmanian Devil.  As I learned over the years of being saved I’m still learning, but I have learned one thing my old Pastor Reverend Dr. Willie E. Robinson used to say to me when I get angry, “it ain’t that deep”.  I never understood that until I started walking with the Lord, and people started to watch me. I had to practice what I preached. My wife going on seven years Stephanie as always has been there for me, with and without my temper.  She will also tell you that God is working in my life with me and my temper.  I should wear a construction sign that says, “Under construction”.  Does that make me an expert on self-control, no not really; nerveless, I know where to go and what to do. I hope and pray that it will help you in your walk as a self-controlled Christian Man. May God Bless you and keep you all who read this. I’ll leave you with this from Matthew 7:7-8: “Ask, and it shall be given you seek, and ye shall find, knock, and it shall be opened unto you: for everyone that asketh receiveth; and he that seeth findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened”.  When upset or you’re going to be upset don’t be afraid to call on Jesus to assist you.

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About the Author
Evangelist Dillard is a licensed evangelist for Christ working in outreach ministries since 2001 and has a heart for the unsaved in the world. Evangelist Dillard attended New Life Bible School in Philadelphia, PA in the year of 2006 and was trained in Evangelism at First Baptist Church of Darby in Darby, PA. Pastor and Biblical Director of the Lighthouse Bible Institute, also he is a Member of the Ministerial Allience of Fort Madsion, Iowa